ch-ch-ch-changesss

This last week has brought about some changes to our lives.

On Tuesday Caroline came home to tell me that she had run completely out of money and could no longer afford to stay at the hostel.

On Thursday she had a job interview and was called and offered said job while on the way back to the hostel.

She then decided that she needed to move in with our friend Alice until she has money again, so just over a week.  I didn’t want to have to pack up all the things to move out then move back in so I decided I would just stay at the hostel by myself.

On Sunday we went to visit Alice and she said we should both just move in until we get our own place.

So today we moved out of the hostel and into Alice’s flat.  We’re occupying “Alice’s lounge”, which is a kind of small living area in the middle of the house.  We put together a couple of Ikea futon sofa beds (cue Ikea rage, which is an actual flat-pack furniture assembly thing).  More from Caroline than from me, I’d like to point out.  It’s real chill, and the room suddenly feels much more homely than it did before when it was just kind of empty.

I had my first shower in a proper house (not hostel) since I moved over.

Due to not reading the work roster properly I failed to turn up to a shift for the first time this afternoon (this will be the first and last time I make this mistake I can assure you).

I’m going to suggest that the general direction of things is a positive one.

“You don’t like chicken?” he asks.

“It’s not that,” Mari says.  “But I make a point of not eating chicken out.”
“Why not?”
“Especially the chicken they serve in chain restaurants—they’re full of weird drugs.  Growth hormones and stuff.  The chickens are locked in these dark, narrow cages, and given all these shots, and their feed is full of chemicals, and they’re put on conveyor belts, and machines cut their heads off and pluck them . . .”

—After Dark
Haruki Murakami

This was me two years ago before I stopped eating meat altogether.

 

Image: Cédric Delsaux

nothing and everything

One day you wake up in the morning to the realisation that things are not how they were before.  Or maybe your brain wakes up to it at a completely different time altogether.  The point is, this is not what it was then, and it is unlikely to ever be again.

in his blue gardens

You may remember me making a statement about how I had firmly decided to stop buying things until I have somewhere to live.  Maybe I said it more in reference to having a job, but having somewhere to live is almost more important, because when you buy things you have to have somewhere to put them.

Anyway, the point is that I have well and truly fallen off the non-purchasing wagon.  My DVD collection has continued to expand regularly, and I just spent another $60 on books because I went to this bookshop and couldn’t help myself.  I even bought the copy of The Great Gatsby you see in the picture below, not because I don’t already have a copy (I just last week finished reading the copy I bought a couple of weeks ago), but because it’s my new favourite book.  And look at it.  It’s so beautiful!  The design is by Tiffany & Co. and is based on their collection from the 1920′s and also draws inspiration from other sources from the period.

“He had thrown himself into it with a creative passion, adding to it all the time, decking it out with every bright feather that drifted his way. No amount of fire or freshness can challenge what a man will store up in his ghostly heart.”
—The Great Gatsby
F. Scott Fitzgerald

So we drove on toward death through the cooling twilight.

—The Great Gatsby
F. Scott Fitzgerald

Love & Loss & Love

18 months ago I was in a video for this song.  This is not that video.

An update on Limbo

This is a strange time in my life.  I don’t know if I’ve already said this.  Maybe I said it before I moved to Melbourne, but I’m going to say it again anyway.  My life at the moment basically consists of going to work at my new cinema and coming  home to the hostel I’m living in (until things settle down and I’ve got a decent amount of work, and Caroline has a job and we start looking for a flat).  We go to our regular place for coffee and muffins (where everyone knows your name—well we’re on first name terms with the owners anyway).  This morning I went to another cafe I’ve been going to a bit and the girl at the counter even remembered my name even though she’s served me maybe twice.  And it was really busy.  We’ve got a bit of a routine.  Sort of.  If you include sleeping in a lot (no changes there then).

I guess what I’m really saying is that I’m still not quite settled in.  Not having a proper home, while not the worst, is definitely not ideal.  I’m training on production at work (essentially projection) which I’m feeling really positive about, but I’d still really like to get past the “new guy” vibe.  I’ve started going to Hillsong’s new Melbourne church which I’m really enjoying, but going to a church where you literally know no one is also not the easiest.

And another thing.  Before I came over I was told by a few different people that Australians can be difficult to deal with.  I have to say that my experience is quite the opposite, and I would even go so far as to say that I think Kiwis can be more obnoxious than Australians.  I feel kind of bad in saying that, but the difference in attitude here is quite noticeable.  I think it’s something to do with the fact that people seem to have more respect for each other’s ‘personness’ or something.  It’s hard to explain.

It’s strange thinking I’ve been here almost seven weeks.  It seems like longer but also like we’ve just arrived (I even keep unconsciously entering the door code from my old job at work when I’m not paying attention).

I’m not saying I’m not loving it.  I still catch myself wondering at the fact that I live here now.  Crazy!

Eat Crow

Today is brought to you by the letter ‘I’

Life for an introvert isn’t exactly the easiest thing.  Especially when you decide to leave everything behind and start over in a new place.  Introverts tend to find new situations, and in particular new people, to be somewhat overwhelming.  It takes us some time to warm up to things or people.  Unless the process is helped along by someone more outgoing than we are.

Up until now work has been pretty easy.  Obviously coming from a cinema background it’s not difficult to get back into the routine, but there have also up till this point been really good people to lubricate the experience, tell me what I need to know, be generally friendly, that kind of thing.  Tonight it was all over.

I had my first shift as an usher, and instead of explaining in a helpful manner what I’m meant to be doing I’m kind of pointed in a direction and left to it.  Or when I ask, “what should we be doing”, on my first shift being told, “look busy”, isn’t helpful, and isn’t a real answer.  It also teaches me pretty quickly who not to ask when I have questions.

Which is fine.  But I don’t want to be the new person anymore.  I want to just be one of the guys.  I want it to be two months down the line where I know everyone and they know me, and it’s just normal and easy.

Is that too much to ask?

Mindmeld

It’s amazing how much you can miss something without being conscious of it.

This morning I caught up with Andrea for brunch.  She was in Melbourne for 10 days and she doesn’t live in Auckland so I don’t get the chance to see that much of her.  Anyway, the point is that getting the chance to talk to someone who sees things, and particularly spiritual/theological things, from the same point of view as me is such a relief.  I would say that even in Auckland I didn’t get much of that, and since I’ve been here basically none.  So not only did I get to see and catch up with a good friend I don’t see anywhere near enough of, but we had really good talks about the general things that tend to just live inside my head for the most part.

I also haven’t found a church that I’m really happy going to, and she was able to point me in the direction of somewhere new to try on Sunday, which is another thing I’ve found hard since being in Melbourne.  People who know about these things.

She’s coming back for a while in June to housesit for her aunt and uncle, so I’m going to make the most of it when she’s here.