In which my heart

In which my heart starts to beat faster and the thoughts I’ve been trying to restrain start frantically whirling around in my mind.  I try to grasp at them and push them back down, standing on tip-toes, jumping, wildly grabbing at insubstial vapours.  I can do nothing but wait for them to settle again in their own time.  My body aches, and I am listless, lying staring at nothing.  Waiting.  Hoping.  Sighing.

But what can I do?

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