heart/sick

Lying in the darkness, turning things over in my mind.  Picking up each thought, examining it from every angle until holding onto it becomes so painful it has to be put away and the next taken up and examined.  Every second thought has one clear theme.  Why?  Why did this happen?  What is it’s purpose?  Is life truly so cruel?  I can’t believe it, yet the evidence would appear to speak to itself.  And the thoughts keep coming and coming and coming.  These are not like sheep to be counted, but a battle, each, to be fought against, to be turned aside.  I can scarcely believe it is true.  Is it true?  Time will tell, and time is not our friend.

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